[ Originally, he hated the idea and notion of having to train with Izuku at all, still deranged and fueled with inner angers that often were intoxicating to him. However, seeing how he was that day, resting, and understanding that things likely were only going to get worse from here on out. Katsuki understood there were things beyond his own selfish ego; he just hoped Izuku wouldn't rely solely on Katsuki to make things any better than they were.
He hated that, and yet, deep down, he was glad Izuku relied on him so much, which is why, in this moment between them. Katsuki wants Izuku to believe in him and in what he says.
They were supposed to be rivals all the way to the end, and he isn't supposed to be helping Izuku train for some war, but here they are. Standing to one another, facing this reality that they had been dealt with.
Everything within Katsuki just feels like a boiling fuel that turns into more anger, and a hurt that he can't atone for. It isn't guilt from the past, and it's from a sort of longing that irritates his nerves. ]
[He does. He's always known that Bakugo was perfectly capable. It just hasn't stopped the worry of something happening to him. To any of their friends in all of this. Izuku can't help but fret. Feeling the weight of it all. The pressure. He knows what he has to do. He's just not sure if he can accept the reality of the likelihood of someone getting seriously hurt or worse. If anything happened to the class because of this. If he isn't strong enough or isn't fast enough. Overlook something in their planning....]
I just...I can't accept something happening to you or the others because of me.
Then, what did you accept the apology for? What did you come back for? What about what Pink Cheeks said? [ Especially what she said, what she said was so invaluable, and her words reached the hearts of many people. Moving them to let Izuku find a safe place to stay. ] Do you still not...? [ Katsuki bites the inside of his cheeks, trying to simmer his anger. ] Are you still looking down on us?
I'm not -- no. Nothing like that. I've just spent so long on edge.
[So long alone. So long aware that, should he go back here that it would make the school a target. That would put everyone at risk because of him. Leaving and staying away was the best thing he could think of. The only way around it. It's hard to shake that. To keep reminding himself that this was okay. Even if part of him was still anxious. That they had accepted the risk of letting him stay regardless. They probably would have all along if Izuku hadn't just run off like that.]
[ Katsuki's nose scrunches up, and he feels his chest go hollow as if it had been dug out. The pain inside of it is cool, cold even - he's trying hard to figure out how to fix this. This isn't how it's supposed to be, reaching for her head, the blonde seems exasperated. ]
How could you say that? Nothing is going to happen to me - [ Why doesn't Izuku get that? ] Why can't you trust that? [ Believe in me, angrily he comes closer. Stepping off the ledge he had been on and rushing to pace forward. Moving with the intent to rush at Izuku and give him a punch to the face - ]
[Izuku does trust Bakugo to handle himself. He knows the other is competent. That's never been in question. But he also knows what they are up against. That it won't be easy. They have to train, to plan. And even then, the best plans can mess up. Izuku isn't ignorant of what this all means. There is always the chance that people would get hurt. Or worse.
He doesn't quite get to answering, as he stumbles, losing his footing as he moves to try and dodge Bakugo rushing at him. His eyes close as he initially winces as he falls backwards.]
I do trust you! I know you can handle yourself. I just....I can't help remembering when you pushed me out of the way then.
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no subject
He hated that, and yet, deep down, he was glad Izuku relied on him so much, which is why, in this moment between them. Katsuki wants Izuku to believe in him and in what he says.
They were supposed to be rivals all the way to the end, and he isn't supposed to be helping Izuku train for some war, but here they are. Standing to one another, facing this reality that they had been dealt with.
Everything within Katsuki just feels like a boiling fuel that turns into more anger, and a hurt that he can't atone for. It isn't guilt from the past, and it's from a sort of longing that irritates his nerves. ]
Take me seriously.
[ Please. ]
no subject
[He does. He's always known that Bakugo was perfectly capable. It just hasn't stopped the worry of something happening to him. To any of their friends in all of this. Izuku can't help but fret. Feeling the weight of it all. The pressure. He knows what he has to do. He's just not sure if he can accept the reality of the likelihood of someone getting seriously hurt or worse. If anything happened to the class because of this. If he isn't strong enough or isn't fast enough. Overlook something in their planning....]
I just...I can't accept something happening to you or the others because of me.
no subject
no subject
[So long alone. So long aware that, should he go back here that it would make the school a target. That would put everyone at risk because of him. Leaving and staying away was the best thing he could think of. The only way around it. It's hard to shake that. To keep reminding himself that this was okay. Even if part of him was still anxious. That they had accepted the risk of letting him stay regardless. They probably would have all along if Izuku hadn't just run off like that.]
If anything happened to you....
no subject
How could you say that? Nothing is going to happen to me - [ Why doesn't Izuku get that? ] Why can't you trust that? [ Believe in me, angrily he comes closer. Stepping off the ledge he had been on and rushing to pace forward. Moving with the intent to rush at Izuku and give him a punch to the face - ]
I SAID, WHY DON'T YOU TRUST THAT!?
[ Trust ME?! ]
no subject
[Izuku does trust Bakugo to handle himself. He knows the other is competent. That's never been in question. But he also knows what they are up against. That it won't be easy. They have to train, to plan. And even then, the best plans can mess up. Izuku isn't ignorant of what this all means. There is always the chance that people would get hurt. Or worse.
He doesn't quite get to answering, as he stumbles, losing his footing as he moves to try and dodge Bakugo rushing at him. His eyes close as he initially winces as he falls backwards.]
I do trust you! I know you can handle yourself. I just....I can't help remembering when you pushed me out of the way then.